Navigation Salon Salon People email print
Arts & Entertainment
Books
Comics
Health & Body
Media
Mothers Who Think
News
.People
Politics2000
Technology
- Free Software Project
Travel & Food
_______
Columnists

- - - - - - - - - - - -


Salon People is sponsored by Lexus

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Current
Wire Stories

Click here to read the latest stories from the wires.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Also Today

For a full list of today's Salon People stories, go to the People home page.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Search Salon


  
Advanced Search  |  Help

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Recently in Salon People

Nothing Personal
Bummed, waterlogged and de-shagged
This is Marie Osmond off drugs; find Jimmy Hoffa, win a prize; new management book takes a look at Moses, MBA. Plus: Jennifer Aniston laments her hair; and Liddy Dole's do does her in.

By Amy Reiter
[10/23/99]

Rogues' Gallery
Old Testament prophets were pimps, says novelist
Never underestimate the effectiveness of blasphemy as a marketing strategy. Plus: Good news! You can join the Mile High Club with a stranger and stay married.

By Douglas Cruickshank
[10/23/99]

Nothing Personal
Hair today, gone tomorrow
Bowl cut Dole? Why a different style might've helped. Larry King and Jennifer Love Hewitt on repetitive motion; Diana Ross on excessive emotion; and why the "Friends" got a loser promotion.

By Amy Reiter
[10/22/99]

People Feature
Letter from occupied Bel-Air
Our fearless correspondent's second dispatch from the entertainment industry's demilitarized zone: Ass-kickings at Cirque du Soleil, silence and clanking silverware at the 7th Annual Diversity Awards and a ride in George Clooney's limo!

Read communiqué No. 1!
By David Goodman
[10/22/99]

Nothing Personal
Shag-a-delic no more
Jennifer Aniston laments shaggy-do; Woody Harrelson can jump; James Carville smells a rat; and Martha Stewart's IPO: It's a good thing.

By Amy Reiter
[10/21/99]

Complete archives for People

- - - - - - - - - - - -

- - - - - - - - - - - -




Qualified to satisfy you | page 1, 2

Despite the popular impression that White was born in a plush velvet dressing gown with a bubble bath already waiting, he came, in fact, from the gang-banging background common to so many inner-city kids. You could hurt yourself whipsawing back and forth between White's Hallmark love speeches and the details of his early life, which he spent scuffling and scrapping and landing in jail for petty crimes. For that matter, you might have a hard time trying to match his saccharine advice with details of his own love life. The big man with the satin voice that resonates in those lower regions is constantly referring to the great and powerful love he has for his Lady. Not something as mundane as an actual flesh-and-blood woman, mind you, but his one and only true love -- Lady Music. I've learned to respect her beyond any woman. Everybody wants her, I know. But I love her in a special way. We've been fruitful and had lots of babies together ... Love your special other the way I love my Lady Music, and you will find a level of happiness you never knew was possible. Especially if you're not barricaded in the studio all night while, back home, the candles burn down and dinner coagulates. The Barry White credo: Do as I croon, not as I do.

White paints a benign self-portrait of a believer in peace, love and astrology. But like a romantic dinner disrupted by an unforeseen fart, some of White's tales unexpectedly break the spell. They show a man whose fierce pride is occasionally backed by his street instincts. "Fed up and angry, I pulled my .357 Magnum out of the big leather coat I was wearing and without saying a word laid it in front of me on the table," White says of one meeting with startled record company executives.

The negotiations concluded to Barry's satisfaction. "I prefer to deal in truth, not deception," he insists. "Trust, not trickery." Thus spake Barry White: Speak truthfully, and carry a .357 Magnum.

As a black man coming of age in the '60s, some of White's best stories show a side of that decade white folks never knew. His first tour saw him playing drums for Jackie Lee, who was then riding an R&B hit called "The Duck." It took him to the legendary Apollo Theatre in New York, where he met legends like Smokey Robinson backstage. After that auspicious beginning, the tour literally and figuratively went South. White and Jackie Lee were thrown in jail in Hattiesburg, Miss., for talking back to rednecks; woke up in a Louisiana motel to see the Klan packing up the caravan for a little trip; and faced down a group of white boys in a parking lot after a show (while headline act Slim Harpo hid his white girlfriend in the trunk of a car). The capper: White stopped at a pay phone in Mobile, Ala., to call his wife back in L.A. "Baby, get me area code 213," he told the operator.

"Just a minute, sir, the lines are tied up," she replied. Moments later the phone booth was surrounded by police cars. "You called our operator 'baby,'" drawled one cop. "Where you from, boy?"

"California."

"See, that there's the reason you don't know. Our niggers, they know how to talk on the phone. We get another call in this state that you called some operator 'baby,' you goin' to jail. Hear that, boy?"

White showed them. He's spent most of the last 30 years cooing "Baby, baby, baby" to women all across that state and every other state besides. Along the way he's learned not only of the awesome power of love, but also of the awesome power of "The Simpsons." His appearance on the snake-whacking episode won him fans who weren't even alive when he was rumbling his way through the boudoir stereo systems of the '70s.

White's devotees include Muhammad Ali and the Sultan of Brunei, who has arranged private Barry White concerts (Elton John concerts too, among others) for groups of about 20. And one day White came face to face with a man whose private yacht is stocked only with the music of Barry White. "Mr. White, I'm one of your biggest admirers," the fan enthused. "I can't tell you how much I love your music. I listen to it all the time!"

In what may be the least surprising revelation in the book, the yacht owner is identified as Sen. Ted Kennedy.
salon.com | Oct. 25, 1999

 

- - - - - - - - - - - -

About the writer
Steve Burgess is a freelance writer in Vancouver, British Columbia.

Table Talk
A life relived What is your favorite biography?

Sound off
Send us a Letter to the Editor

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Print this story  Get a printer-friendly version

Email this story  E-mail a friend about this article

Backflip This Story  Backflip this article to find it again

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Search Salon


  
Advanced Search  |  Help

 

Salon | Search | Archives | Contact Us | Table Talk | Ad Info

Arts & Entertainment | Books | Comics | Life | News | People
Politics | Sex | Tech & Business | Audio
The Free Software Project | The Movie Page
Letters | Columnists | Salon Plus

Copyright © 2000 Salon.com All rights reserved.