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Amy Reiter

Another one bites the bust
"Love my breasts" disease strikes Zeta-Jones; Hef's a uniter, not a divider; and Beck on why he was bullied ... but in a fair way.

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By Amy Reiter

March 21, 2000 | Just when you thought it was safe to open another celebrity magazine ...

The dread mammarius self-approbitis strikes again. This time, the mysterious breast-praising disease comes on slow, creeping up on Catherine Zeta-Jones during an interview with InStyle magazine.

Writer Johanna Schneller duly notes its progress. Zeta-Jones, she reports, "touches herself here and there" as she talks. "She presses the lush curve of her upper lip flat with her fingertips. She runs a hand lightly down her neck. She pulls a sterling-silver clip from her hair and rubs the cascading strands against her cheek."



Amy Reiter

Amy Reiter's column appears daily on the People site, Monday through Friday.

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Got a hot tip? Tell Amy!



Yup, the early symptoms are all there, and when the topic turns to femininity Zeta-Jones is felled by a full-blown attack. She clutches her breasts in both hands and declares, "I love being a woman -- I love my breasts."

How long will science let female celebrities suffer without a cure?

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A paragon of modesty

"I'm not secure in my figure. If I could shower in my bathing suit, I would."

-- Jennifer Love Hewitt on why she hasn't done a nude scene yet, in the upcoming issue of USA Weekend.

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Playboy family values

What does the Supreme Court know?

On Monday, the justices may have upheld a ban on Playboy at Arizona jails aimed at preventing inmate fights and harassment of jail employees -- but Playboy king Hugh Hefner says he's a uniter, not a divider.

Take, for example, his relationship with twins Sandy and Mandy Bentley. According to Hef, the 22-year-old sisters, who attended colleges in different cities, hardly saw each other before he started doing ... er, dating ... them in tandem. But now they catch up every weekend at the Playboy mansion.

By sleeping with both 22-year-old sisters at the same time, he boasts to Wireless Flash, he has brought them "closer than ever before."

Well, now, isn't that just the sweetest thing?

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Equal-opportunity oddness

"I don't think it was just because I was the only white kid in a predominantly Latino neighborhood. I don't even think it was the fact that I looked like a girl. I was an odd little white boy. I would've been an odd little Salvadoran boy."

-- Beck on why he was picked on by neighborhood bullies as a kid, in the U.K. Telegraph.

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Juicy bits

Are Carmen Electra and Dennis Rodman about to pull a Pamela and Tommy Lee? Electra has told Controversy magazine that she and her estranged hubby's bizarre relationship might be on the rebound. "We've been talking about it for a while now ... but I really feel we need time to ourselves so that we can figure out what we truly want in our lives," says the former "Baywatch" babe. "You have to love yourself before you can love anyone else." The rough times, she reckons, make her love that cross-dressin' foo' all the more. "There is something about that excitement," she says, "and I'm not afraid of a challenge." Well, OK then.

Don't get Tom Cruise started on lawyers. Or managers. "It's a scam, an absolute scam," Cruise says of the legal profession in the upcoming Talk magazine. "People get a lawyer, and how much do you pay a lawyer? 10, 15 percent? You have a manager; they want 15 percent. And then you have an agent ... Nowhere else in the world in any other business do they have this setup ... There is only a limited amount of money you're going to earn, and you're either going to get it or you're not." Shed a tear for poor Tom, won't you?

Brandi Chastain's bra is going postal. The African country of Liberia is introducing a new postage-stamp series honoring the World Cup-winning U.S. Women's Soccer Team. One stamp will depict Chastain's famous shirt-shedding moment. Good thing she's such a good sport.
salon.com | March 21, 2000

 

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About the writer
Amy Reiter is a staff writer for Salon People. For more columns by Amy Reiter, visit her column archive.

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