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"I was the fifth Teletubby"; Saul Obarzanek, tailor to the political stars, on Tipper, the nipper and presidential zippers; Michaeldouglas.com would like to apologize for any inconvenience; Kevin Eubanks says no doggie implants! Plus: Isn't he great? The press does John McCain.

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Reiter

Coming clean
Is he or isn't he? Mr. Clean tells all; Randy on the set! Will & Grace & uncontrollable urges. And a helpful reminder from Liam: Oasis and the Beatles, different band.

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By Amy Reiter

Feb. 7, 2000 | Mr. Clean has a secret ... but he might not keep it much longer. The earring, the bulging biceps, the tight white T-shirt, the painted-on pants, the fashionably shaved head, the wry expression -- animated advertisement or not, the guy's a gay icon.

But is he gay?

"We've been receiving questions like that for at least the past 10 years," says Mr. Clean spokesman Damon Jones. "We're not sure where it started -- it could have to do with his earring or his attire -- but we like to think Mr. Clean was just a man before his time."



Amy Reiter

Amy Reiter's column appears daily on the People site, Monday through Friday.

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Got a hot tip? Tell Amy!



But the man's time to come clean about his sexual orientation may be upon us.

In a new version of his Web site set to launch later this month, the chrome-domed, "two-fisted" fictional cleaner will speak in full sentences for the first time, issuing household cleaning advice. And while most of the more than 2,000 questions he's programmed to respond to run along the lines of "How do I get chocolate croissant stains out of my carpet?" he's prepared to answer the question "Mr. Clean, are you gay?" once and for all.

"He'll definitely have an answer to that question," says Jones. "Whether it will be the answer people want to hear or not, that is a different story."

No wonder most people store him in the closet.

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Tears for cheers

"I'm trying very hard not to do a Gwyneth here. This is such an honor. I'm so terrified -- If you were all 9 years old I'd feel so much more comfortable."

-- "Harry Potter" author J.K. Rowling, accepting the British Book Award for author of the year last week.

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Touching camaraderie

Mr. Clean might want to take lessons in sexual forthcomingness from the stars of the TV show "Will & Grace."

In the upcoming issue of TV Guide, the actors admit things tend to get a little randy on the set -- and they like it that way.

"We're always climbing all over each other," says Megan Mullally, who plays Karen Walker on the show. "It's like the light in our lives."

"We can get pretty naughty," confirms Debra Messing (aka Grace).

And Eric McCormack, who plays Will, boasts that he likes to manhandle guest stars like Gregory Hines and Sydney Pollack -- in the interest of helping them fit in, of course.

"I squeeze their butts on the way in," he tells the magazine. "That way, they're initiated and the hazing is over."

How thoughtful.

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Gabby road

"You'll never get a 'Sgt. Pepper' off us. We're not that fucking far out. You've got to be fucked up to make shit like that. We're not the Beatles."

-- Oasis front man Liam Gallagher, clearing up a common misconception in the upcoming Spin.

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Juicy bits

Beam this up: James Doohan, who played Scotty on the original "Star Trek," has announced that he and his wife, Wende, are expecting a new baby, due just after Doohan's 80th birthday. "I'm a little slower than I used to be, but I don't have any aches or pains and we're planning to give the baby all the love in the world," the actor told London's Daily Mail. And you thought Captain Kirk was virile.

Celine Dion is not pregnant with twins -- but she is having a cow over the National Enquirer's recent story that she was. "We're going to sue the National Enquirer for publishing a false story," her husband, Rene Angelil, told Le Journal de Montreal. Conceive that.

The doctor is in. In jail, that is. The Associated Press reports that Pamelyn Ferdin, who provided the voice of Lucy on the "Peanuts" specials, was sentenced last week to 30 days in jail for carrying a "bull hook" -- a wooden rod with a metal hook used by elephant trainers -- to a rally protesting cruelty to circus animals. The 39-year-old actress told the press, "I have no fear of going to jail if it helps to inform people about how cruel elephants are treated at circuses." And she doesn't just mean having the football yanked away.
salon.com | Feb. 7, 2000

 

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About the writer
Amy Reiter is a staff writer for Salon People. For more columns by Amy Reiter, visit her column archive.

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