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Nothing Personal
If this boat's a-rockin'...
Jerry Hall and Paul Allen makin' waves in French waters? Oasis members get good and gobsmacked. The cut-ups at the K.C. Star take clowning too far. Plus: Money talks, "Bulworth" walks, Beatty for prez!

By Amy Reiter
[08/11/99]

Column
God is dead. So is art ... Show us your tits!
Museums are supposed to be the last outposts of cultural experience, inspiring us to be less idiotic. Instead, they're sucking down to our lowest impulses.

By Cintra Wilson
[08/11/99]

Nothing Personal
Dennis Rodman, auteur
Ex-hoops star revealed to be creative visionary; Hugh Grant on scintillating secrets of celebrity nostril evacuation. Plus: We bid adieu to Tish, a great and noble fish, though a wee bit moody on occasion.

By Amy Reiter
[08/10/99]

Brilliant Careers
Fred Rogers
For three decades, "Mister Rogers' Neighborhood" has been an oasis of peace and calm, familiarity and safety in a kid-unfriendly world.

By Joyce Millman
[08/10/99]

Nothing Personal
Camilla to Charles: "Oh, behave!"
The prince and Parker Bowles will, ahem, "vacation" together; John Wayne Bobbitt loses it -- again! Plus: Did Robin Hood and King Edward II have a thang goin' on?

By Amy Reiter
[08/06/99]

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Reiter

Aargh! Online celebrity surgery!
Maybe they're right about regulating the Internet: Carnie Wilson goes live with her gastric bypass; Claire Danes, urine the movies now. Plus: Look out, Hillary, look out, Rudy, here comes Grandpa Munster!

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By Amy Reiter

August 12, 1999 | Online celebrity surgery -- it's the latest craze. Me, I regard live Web surgical broadcasts much as I do solar eclipses, averting my eyes in the interest of my own health and well being.

But clearly, not everyone sees (or doesn't see) things as I do, which explains why rubberneckers hoping to gape at singer Carnie Wilson's live gastric bypass surgery, in which her stomach was trimmed to make a smaller pouch and her bowel and intestine were reconnected to her new stomach, encountered slower connections and more traffic than, say, bus riders in Los Angeles.

The disappointed many can, however, download the archived surgery at the L.A.-based (where else?) Web site A Doctor in Your House, as well as read the flab-flouting 31-year-old's pre-surgical chat, in which she confesses that, though obese, she has "plenty of friends, a great social life, fabulous sex, big orgasms."

Here's hoping Winston Churchill's granddaughter, former Vogue model Arabella McLeod, can say the same. She's about to undergo a facelift -- broadcast live on the Web at CelebrityDoctor.com -- to get rid of the jowls she inherited from her wartime prime minister gramps. "I want to look younger and not quite have the same family traits," she recently told Woman's Journal magazine.

As her famous grandpa might say: We shape our jowls, and afterwards our jowls shape us.

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Big bottom: Talk about mud flaps, my gal's got 'em

"You can't forget that you are semi-naked with your bottom hanging out."

-- Ample actress Charlotte Brittain on her role in the upcoming indie flick "Secret Society," sort of a female sumo-wrestling version of "The Full Monty." (How could she leave that behind?)

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The rigors of stardom, a continuing series

A scene from the less glamorous side of acting: Claire Danes and Kate Beckinsale are in Manila filming "Brokedown Palace," the gritty, all-too-realistic tale of two carefree young gals unsuspectingly lured into a drug-smuggling nightmare in Thailand. On location at a disused prison, the actresses have no problem attaining the horrified and humiliated expressions called for in the script -- they're kneeling in cat pee.

The smell of urine, Beckinsale recently told entertainment reporter Baird Jones, "was overwhelming. Obviously this was like a favorite location for all the local cats to pee, which cats do; they find a territory. We kept telling the tech staff to rake the gravel for anything solid, but in the Philippines heat, it was still horrendous."




Amy Reiter

Amy Reiter's column appears daily on the People site, Monday through Friday.

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The script called for the actresses to bow down and grovel in the gravel before their captors, and says Beckinsale, "the film crew thought it was hysterical and the director kept making us do all these extra takes until we almost fainted."

But there may be a whiff of divine justice in the stanky kitty litter box episode. (The film opens this Friday.) Jones tells Nothing Personal that Beckinsale has been hiding a big batch of kittens from her "snoopy landlady" in her no-pets rental apartment in London's Sheppard's Bush neighborhood. Meow. - - - - - - - - - - - -

Fred 99? Just doesn't have the same ring

"They shouldn't have called this one Woodstock. It should have been called Fred or anything else."

-- Erstwhile Jefferson Airplane front gal Grace Slick on what's in a name

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Senator Grandpa?

Look out, Hillary. Watch your back, Rudy. Grandpa Munster's on your tail. Al Lewis, who played everyone's favorite widow's-peaked bloodsucking oldster on the classic '60s show "The Munsters," is throwing his pointiness into the already entertaining New York senatorial race.

The tough-talking 89-year-old, who once ran unsuccessfully for governor of New York, called a press conference on Monday to announce that he has formed an exploratory committee to become the Green Party's candidate for the hotly contested Senate seat. Although Lewis concedes that winning the race with little backing and money is "like climbing Mount Everest barefooted," he dismisses his big-name rivals as "Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum."

Someone's going for the Hillary Steps. Sherpas at the ready.
salon.com | August 12, 1999

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About the writer
Amy Reiter is a staff writer for Salon People. For more columns by Amy Reiter, visit her column archive.

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