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People home page. - - - - - - - - - - - - Search Salon - - - - - - - - - - - - Salon Columnists - - - - - - - - - - - - Recently in Salon People People Feature Nothing Personal People Feature Brilliant Careers What's Your Story? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - |
Hyperbole is hell
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August 4, 1999 |
-- Media buzz queen Tina Brown on why she didn't do prelaunch interviews for her mega-mega-mega-hyped new magazine,
Talk. (Guess that huge star-studded launch party Monday night on
Liberty Island -- with everyone from Madonna to Henry Kissinger in attendance -- was supposed to be hidden under
the torch-toting French Lady's hype-obscuring robes, eh, Tina?) - - - - - - - - - - - - All Talk: Bad, bad Tina Brown Amid all the Talk about Tina (the buzz about Brown?), spare a sympathetic thought -- won't you? -- for the sweat-soaked, ink-stained
wretches who worked long and hard to churn out the gabbed-about new rag. "Compared to working for Tina Brown," writes tart tattler
Toby Young in a piece spiked from the New York Post at the last minute and posted Tuesday on MediaGossip.com, "a tour of duty in Kosovo is a walk in the park." Young, who, like Brown, enjoyed a notorious stint at Vanity Fair (he under its current editor, Graydon Carter), attempts to
staunch the media gush over Tina's magazine-making brilliance -- portraying her as flaky, shallow, remote and sometimes nasty -- and
lands a final, well-placed punch with this snarky little anecdote: "In 1985 Tina asked [former Vanity Fair editor John Heilpern] to commission a short story for the Christmas issue and he
managed to persuade Isaac Bashevis Singer to write one. He turned it in and a few days later it came back to him with the
words 'Beef it up Singer' scrawled on the bottom in big red letters. 'I had to gently explain to Tina,' laughs Heilpern, 'that "Beef it up
Singer" was a recipient of the Nobel Prize for Literature.'" - - - - - - - - - - - - Stinky party favors "My goal is to meet the woman of my dreams in the armpit of Lady Liberty." -- Late Show host Conan "The Barbarian" O'Brien on his kinky agenda at the Talk launch party. - - - - - - - - - - - - The heck with success; get this man a bra! If Chris Rock is to be believed, it's a wonder there aren't more plus-size lingerie shops in Hollywood. "Being famous is like having big tits," the comedian confesses in Playboy's September issue. "People always stare. In some ways that's
good, because a girl with big tits can go anywhere and people always want to do whatever they can for her." What's more, says the metaphorically chesty funnyman, early success meant he was able "to fuck girls I had no business fucking," but
he admits that fame has its drawbacks -- paranoia chief among them. Rock says he's still trying to figure out if his wife would have
married him if he were still a struggling stand-up sponging off the folks in Brooklyn and recently consulted fellow self-made man
Mike "Bad as I wanna be" Tyson on the matter. The comic with the biting tongue and the fighter with the biting teeth both decided that, in fact, their lovely wives couldn't possibly love them
for who they were. "Nobody likes us for us," said Rock, stressing that their crisis of confidence "says nothing bad about our wives and
everything about us." Maybe if you boys showed a bit more cleavage ... - - - - - - - - - - - - The Don delivers his verdict "If he had an Italian last name, they would've electrocuted him." -- John Gotti on President Clinton's wayward ways. - - - - - - - - - - - - Revenge of the camper Amy Reiter Amy Reiter's column appears daily on the People site, Monday through Friday.
Got a hot tip? Tell Amy! Did one of the world's most closely guarded secrets leak out through summer-camp pillow talk? Chase Culeman-Beckman, a 19-year-old from Port Chester, N.Y., recently told the Hartford Courant that Carl Bernstein's son, Jacob, tipped him off to the identity of Deep Throat when they were at camp together in 1988. The Watergate source was, he said, W. Mark Felt, the former associate director of the FBI whose name has long been among those considered likely to have tipped off the Washington Post's Bernstein and Bob Woodward about Nixon's scandalous White House shenanigans. Felt, now 86, denies the report. A snickering Bernstein denies it as well: "Bob and I have been wise enough never to tell our wives, and we've certainly never told our children." He reiterated that the once dynamic duo would identify Deep Throat only upon the source's death. "Is Mark Felt still alive?" Bernstein asked. - - - - - - - - - - - - Juicy bits Quick, call in Austin "That's a man, baby" Powers! A female athlete taking part in the World Veteran Athlete's Games has been accused by Australia and New Zealand (both countries that know a thing or two about the land down under) of being a full-fledged fellow. "I am very sad on the part of the athlete in question," said Torsten Carlius of the World Association of Veteran Athletes. "As far as I know, her sexuality has never been called into question before." Well, there is one way to tell for sure ... There's something about Shawn Hatosy's teeth that helped him get the lead role in the new Farrelly brothers new flick, "Outside Providence." The actor says that during his audition, the directing duo spent more time examining his teeth than reviewing his acting skills. "Your teeth are pretty ugly for an actor, but they're perfect for the character," said the siblings, who've clearly never heard of prosthetics. So does that mean Ben Stiller's ... uh ... genetic material in "There's Something About Mary" was real, too? The postman may always ring twice, but if he's delivering letters in the Netherlands, he'd better not be wearing a miniskirt. The Dutch
media are up in arms and scantily clad legs about a male mail carrier who has been suspended from work for a week after
making his rounds in a kicky little skirt. The dastardly deliverer was protesting the post office's ruling that, while female workers can
wear culottes, male workers must wear long trousers -- even in a heat wave. Neither snow, nor sleet, nor unshaved calves ...
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