To print this page, select "Print" from the File menu of your browser salon.com > People July 19, 1999 URL: http://www.salon.com/people/col/reit/1999/07/19/russo Darth disses "Phantom Menace" Actor: "Episode I" is a bowwow; Rene Russo's nudity approved by God. Plus: Britney Spears' mom: They're real, you ignorant goofballs! - - - - - - - - - - - - By Amy Reiter You could call it sour grapes if he weren't so right. David Prowse, the actor who played Darth Vader with a little help from sonorous-voiced heavy breather James Earl Jones in the first three "Star Wars" films, has gone public with his opinion of "The Phantom Menace." The word from the dark side? The flick stinks worse than Jabba the Hutt on a summer day in D.C. It's nothing but "a two-hour toy commercial," says Prowse, griping that George "Still think I'm a genius?" Lucas concentrated on obscure characters to sell toys and turned his back on the things that made the first movie so good. (Like, for instance, casting you, Mr. Prowse?) Still, the actor hopes Lucas will let him take another crack at playing the dark-cloaked villain, noting that the director recently tapped Jones to record seven minutes of dialogue for the not-yet-in-production "Episode III." As pith-brained Jar Jar Binks might say, meesa think yousa better stop badmouthin' "Phantom Menace" if you want more work from Georgie, Massa Prowse, suh. - - - - - - - - - - - - But Mick Jagger said it was on our side ... "Time is Enemy No. 1. Beat time, I say. Kick it!" -- Faye Dunaway, who, incidentally, starred in the 1968 version of "The Thomas Crown Affair," on what she's learned along the way. - - - - - - - - - - - - Gettin' naked in the biblical sense Clearly, Rene Russo is a woman of contradictions: given to speaking in tongues yet ferociously fond of the f-word, plagued by body-image problems but widely regarded as a big-time beauty (Bond man Pierce Brosnan says, "She's got a great ass"), devout Christian yet willing to bare her bodacious bod on the big screen. Wait, is that last one really a contradiction? Russo doesn't think so. "I don't know where in the Bible it says 'Don't be nude in a motion picture,'" the model turned actress recently told Los Angeles magazine. "In some of the most beautiful paintings in the Vatican, people are in the nude." Russo, who gets nekkid and highly erotic with Brosnan in the upcoming remake of "The Thomas Crown Affair," takes her religion so seriously she tithes 10 percent of her earnings to the church. She consulted the big man upstairs to make sure her filmic flash-fest was A-OK with him. Still, she had her limits when it came to the flick's zestiest love scene. "Originally, it was written as this hot, steamy scene that was, like, Uh-uh. No. I'm not going to be on top of him humping him, I can assure you." As it turned out, much is hinted at and, she says, "you see my breasts for a minute. That's pretty much what you see. Less is more, you know? Thank God!" - - - - - - - - - - - - Ignorant goofballs, stand up and be counted "Let me put it this way, if anybody believes it, I brand them an ignorant goofball." -- Britney Spears' mother on speculation that her stacked singin' teenage daughter's gazongas ain't the real deal. - - - - - - - - - - - - Juicy bits Arthur Frommer, lunar nut? In honor of the moon landing's 30th anniversary, the budget-minded travel writer is releasing what might be the first-ever tourist's guide to the moon. (I'm betting the "Getting There" section's a real NASA knee-slapper.) Helpful hints from Mr. F? Don't expect a booze-fest; hooch is an outer space no-no. Don't go rolling around in the moon dust; zero gravity means zero shower. And though the temperature on the moon can soar to 266 degrees, your vacation won't be hot-hot-hot; harsh space conditions are hell on the libido. Start planning your honeymoon now! Oliver Stone? Or Stoned? Arrested in June for swerving, drunken driving, the controversial film director pleaded not guilty last Thursday to two felony drug-possession counts and three misdemeanor charges of driving under the influence. But the Beverly Hills police say in addition to flunking a Breathalyzer test, the cinematically inclined Vietnam vet had a whoppin' stash o' drugs in his 1987 Ford Mustang: Fen-Phen components fenfluramine and phentermine, muscle relaxant Meprobamte, pain-reliever Hydrocodone and a wee pile of weed. It wasn't his fault; it was a conspiracy. salon.com | July 19, 1999