Short and sweet

You can look him straight in the eye and even borrow his clothes: Some reasons why smaller men rock.

By Curtis Sittenfeld

Nov. 8, 2004 | For a person scrolling through any of the major online dating Web sites, it would not be altogether unreasonable to come to the conclusion that the short man is, due to lack of breeding opportunities, in imminent danger of extinction. Take, for example, Salon's own Spring Street Networks, on which attractive women in multiple cities unabashedly express their height preferences: Tikigirl816 is 30 years old and 5-foot-6. She likes the Red Hot Chili Peppers, considers boxers sexy, and wants to date a man between 5-foot-10 and 7-foot-1. Nerfeli, 34 and 5-foot-7, wishes she were currently getting a massage on a beach in Indonesia, though not in the presence of a guy shorter than 6-foot-1. And TBirdieNYC, 28 and 5-foot-8, keeps a bamboo plant in her bedroom -- but if you're under 6 feet, you'll never lay eyes on it.

To be sure, a bias against short men has spanned the ages: Our ancient ancestors associated greater height with a stronger ability to protect and provide. More recently, multiple studies reveal that short men make less money and are less likely to marry or have children than their taller counterparts, that they're deemed less "confident" and "masculine," and that in the United States, this election notwithstanding, they're less likely to become president. (George Bush is 5-foot-11 and John Kerry 6-foot-4). What is new, thanks to the explosion of online dating, is the extent to which technology allows the single woman or man to exercise personal biases, including those surrounding height. Just as you can eliminate a guy who lives too many miles away, or isn't the religion of your choosing, your preference settings can ensure that a guy below your height minimum never even shows up in your searches.

And yet there's an enthusiastic subculture of both straight women and gay men who don't merely tolerate short men, they prefer them. Their message? When you overlook the short man, you don't know what you're missing.

If you keep your eyes peeled, the evidence of this subculture is undeniable: There was, for instance, the episode of "Sex and the City" in which Samantha, initially reluctant to become involved with a suitor so diminutive he buys clothes from Bloomingdale's boys department, ends up dating him for two weeks -- a long relationship for Samantha -- after he tells her, "Give me an hour in the sack, sweetheart, and you'll swear I'm the jolly green giant." Then there was the Aug. 22 New York Times weddings/celebration announcement of lawyers Zoe Schonfeld and Ethan Leib. "It seemed almost experimental to date someone who was four inches shorter than me," Schonfeld, 5-foot-10, told the Times about Leib, 5-foot-6. Meanwhile, out in Hollywood, it's none other than the compactly virile Colin Farrell playing Alexander the Great in November's epic "Alexander." (Farrell is allegedly 5-foot-10, but if he's 5-foot-10, then I'm the queen of Macedonia.)

Next page: "Short men are an underserved market"