Answer these touchy questions correctly, build a rain-gutter model boat, go on a nature walk and you earn a Wolf badge.

When my son, Mikey, announced that he wanted to join the Cub Scouts, I fully expected the Cub Scouts to be about knots, camping trips, tag-team races -- as it was when I was 8. These relics of past scouting days are still there. But scouting today also includes lessons in how to avoid the neighborhood pedophile. That, I suppose, is a lamentable sign of the times, and I understand it. But I did not expect the leaders of our local pack (being wolves, of course they call themselves a pack) to embark on a series of lessons that scared the bejesus out of my son and the rest of the boys.

At a pack meeting last spring, Jack, the assistant pack leader, a tradesman who lifts weights when he's not busy hauling Sheetrock, went over some of the loaded questions on personal safety raised in Chapter 12 of the Wolf Handbook.

I wasn't there, but as best as I can determine, here's what happened:

Tim and Alex were playing keep away from Billy. Charlie and Andy were using the cat as a midair projectile. Joe and Danny were arguing over whether Pikachu had more Pokémon power than Jigglypuff or Kangaskhan.

Jack, the parent in charge, was getting frustrated. Seven 8-year-olds running around your basement would be enough to make Dr. Joyce Brothers wig out. So Jack got tough.

"Sit down," Jack bellowed, his voice bouncing off the oak paneling of the basement walls. "Here's a true story that I want all of you to remember.

"A friend of mine knows a boy who went into a public bathroom. Inside there was a stranger who took a big, sharp pair of scissors and cut the boy's pecker off. Snip! That was it."

Jack's news flash was an attention-getter. The only thing you could hear was the sound of seven jaws dropping.

Then Mikey raised his hand.

"Excuse me, " said Mikey. "What's a pecker?"

Jack said a pecker was the same thing as a penis. The boys looked at each other and then back at Jack. Total silence. For probably the first time in their lives, these boys had heard an adult tell a story about private body parts in public. And no one was giggling hysterically.

The story was no joke, Jack said. It had actually happened.

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