Seven months ago, my wife of 10 years and two children decided she would be happier with someone of her own sex, and as a matter of fact, there was someone in her office who just happened to fit the bill. Anyway, we got divorced, and now we get along (mostly) better than we ever have. And I am here in a small Alaska town wondering how in the hell do I connect with someone?

I'm a shy type of guy. I see an interesting woman headed the other way on the hiking trail, and I can get a hello out of her and perhaps a smile, or a "How's the trail up to Point Bridget?" and then she's gone, headed to the next deadfall. Groups of women are worse. I see women in taverns in town who drive me wild and mountainous with desire, who I could envision bivouacking with in driving sleet, standing with at the winter solstice, staring at the aurora under the Milky Way. Women with whom I could imagine getting tattoos. Invariably, I am struck dumb simply by trying to think of any type of introductory talk. I have no idea how to approach her, be she in the park in summer or in a bluegrass bar in the winter. They smile at me, but I am so totally at a loss of what to say to them it is painful. There is one woman from work whom I am somewhat attracted to, but after 10 years of being in a relationship, I have no idea of what to say to her.

I am 27, living in the Midwest, faced with a major life decision, immobilized by doubt. I have loved a man for over two years. We were good friends and I wanted more; he resisted. Finally, I moved on with my life. He saw me moving on and suddenly realized that he wanted the relationship with me that I had wanted. After several weeks of his pleading, my heart told me to give it a try. I couldn't walk away from something I had spent so long wanting.

So try we did. And it was beautiful in the beginning. We dated for three months and then rented a house together. And from there things went downhill. He felt stifled, I felt him pulling away. We grew apart, but just as we were about to break up, we managed to hang on. We've been through counseling and continue to go. But our lease expires in May and I can't help but feel that if we don't pull things together by then, it means things are over. Despite how much we love each other. If we can't be happy in the first year of dating, how could we possibly survive a long-term commitment?

But the thought of leaving the only man I've ever loved is breaking my heart. I don't know whether to stay and try to work it out or leave him behind. What should I do? And what if I make the wrong choice?

I've just come out of a 15-month, rather intense relationship. I am still madly in love with him even though our breakup was messy. I thought that our problems were resolvable, and he did not. At a New Year's party, I met a rather attractive man, and we hit it off immediately, and at the end of the night, he gave me his phone number. Under normal circumstances, I would be interested in pursuing a relationship with this man, but I am not entirely over the last one. Mutual friends tell me this second one is quite a catch, and they say to go for it, but I'm not sure it would be fair to him to start dating when I'm not entirely over my last love. Should I simply not call him? Should I pursue a friendship? Or do you think the best way for me to get over the last one is to put myself back into the game?

I am 25, about to graduate from law school. I have been dating my boyfriend for two years, and I have just accepted a job at the law firm where he is a partner. Although he knows that my desire is to marry and have a large family, we have never discussed marriage -- until last week when he told me he wanted me to marry him. He seemed upset when I asked if he were "asking" me to marry him. He answered yes and then asked me to marry him. I was so excited, I said, "I don't know what to say." And he said, "Well, then, I withdraw the offer." He said he had planned the proposal, told his friends and his partners, etc., and bought an engagement ring, and he had expected me to be so excited and joyful that I would shout yes. I am hurt and confused. What should I do to get him to apologize for his reaction and ask me to marry him again?