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A L S O__T O D A Y Card bards By Robert Rossney Legend of the Five Rings isn't just a card game -- it's a whole new kind of storytelling - - - - - - - - - - T A B L E__T A L K Did you shop on the Web this holiday season? Share your experiences in the Digital Culture area of Table Talk - - - - - - - - - - R E C E N T L Y Let's Get This Straight By Scott Rosenberg Why we just might get fast Internet lines in our homes before we're all dead (01/14/99) The tortured soul of the Silicon Valley CEO By Janelle Brown Tech-business thrillers put Gates, Jobs on the couch (01/13/99) Ethics of the cross hairs By Andrew Leonard On your computer screen, which is worse -- blasting an alien or shooting a deer? (01/12/99) Joining the mod squad By Todd Levin A gray-market "mod chip" supercharges a Sony PlayStation -- but how does it make you feel? (01/11/99) Let's Get This Straight By Scott Rosenberg So iMacs have fun new colors. What's so revolutionary about tinted plastic? (01/08/99) - - - - - - - - - - BROWSE THE 21ST CHALLENGE ARCHIVES - - - - - - - - - - 21st Log Prank takes down anti-impeachment site _______

____{ RESULTS OF THE 21ST CHALLENGE NO. 17 } BY CHARLIE VARON AND JIM ROSENAU Results of Challenge No. 17, in which we asked you to compose a short e-mail message to a friend whose "apocalyptic, millennial cult" is cut off from the outside world and allows only this one communication per year. - - - - - - - - - - - - J U D G E S'__C O M M E N T S How would you sum up the events of 1998 in 23 words or fewer, e-mailed to a friend who missed it all? And you had to try to pry your friend out of a millennial cult? Impossible? Not for the almost 120 fervent entrants this month. You sliced and diced the year's news, then tricked, teased and taunted your "friend" to rejoin the world. Here are the inspiring results. - - - - - - - - - - - - W I N N E R Hey, do you remember Monica from Hebrew School? Boy, do I have a story to tell you! -- Rebecca Reinhardt - - - - - - - - - - - - H O N O R A B L E __M E N T I O N S Government: McCarthy's back. Stocks: irrationally exuberant. Media: no Seinfeld. Tech: I'm a clone. Titanic: it sank. Di: still dead. Wish you were here! -- Eli Neiburger My coma ended! Uncle Eugene died leaving me seventy million pounds. Come home, marry me. We can afford fertility treatment. I love you! -- Pip Eastop Clinton impeached. Bombed Iraq. Newt resigned. Glenn returned to space. Sinatra dead. Octuplets born. Remember Guyana? You're missing a real life soap opera! -- Cristan Felker 98 extremes: storms, Iraq, McGuire 70 HRs, markets up, Sinatra gone, Clinton impeached over affair. Possible vacancy. Won $25M lottery; need advice. Call. -- Tony Doyle President impeached in sex scandal. Iraqis bombed. Natural disasters everywhere. Yen in big doo-doo. Why hide from world's end? Come out and watch. -- Kay Robart 1998: President Impeached. Iraq Bombed. AOL bought Netscape. You may be right. 1999: New "Star Wars" released. I'll stand in line. Meet me? -- Steve Hoffman Sinatra, Diana, Mother Teresa dead. Clinton kicked, Hillary ticked, wrestler picked, nation sick. Again: Glenn spaced, Iraq sacked. Second thoughts? Don't look back. -- Kay Olson "Guess what! I had a baby ... at 45! We want you to be godfather. The world? Pretty wonderful, with this kid in it. -- Todd Greenwood Can I have your house? -- Doug Andersen Dear _____, The future's nothing like we thought -- it's better and more ridiculous. Larry Flynt is an American Hero; Sonny Bono, a dead congressman. -- Ben Martin This year we discovered that many people enjoy sneaky extramarital sex, and many children have guns. How does your cult measure up? -- Shannon Rhoades America is gentler. Adults collect plush toys. Direct combat is passé. Clinton entertains drug-induced libidos with soft porn. Let's do fruit smoothies soon? -- Rekha Murthy Stay where you are. You're better off being fat, dumb and stupid than being informed. You're right, I should have bought Amazon.com. Bye. -- Angela Crippen Clinton drops trou, But Newt gets kicked out. Broncos defeat. Yankees repeat Dylan's on top. Pvt. Ryan's no flop. Sinatra's former. Weather's warmer. -- Denis Hauptly World leaders solve Y2K problem by rebooting 20th century. Everything that happened after 1900 will be erased. No Soviet, Nazi regimes. -- Jerome A. Schroeder The end of the world arrived last Tuesday. Everyone brought home. Where were you? -- God -- John W. Keating III Still: Rich white guys vs everybody else, Windows. Add: Blown Presidency, El Niño, SUVs Yet: Summer, beer, music, other stuff eternal. -- Lee Rusch Top Ten Things You Missed in 1998: Barbiturates Elvis Lunchboxes Gum Corn Vanity Plates Snowballs Bacon Vacuuming Emily Dickinson Your pal, -- Jim Ward New sea scrolls excavated show HIS birth was really 202 A.D. Please come home, your tests were negative! We always love you! -- Deidri Deane Clinton impeached by zealots. Still at war with Iraq. Does your group have brochures? By the way, McGwire hit 70 homers. -- Charles Star Not much new. Politicians bickered, impeached Clinton, scorched earth. Re-Saddam-ed. Continued globalization of information, fear. Sinatra died. Does your cult have a 401K? -- Jim Chalex I have two words for you: presidential fellatio. Stay where you are, I'll be joining you soon. p.s. Your goldfish is dead. -- Stephanie Marracco Dear John, Dylan records new version of "Chimes of Freedom" for TV show; the coral reefs are dying. See you when I get there. -- Brian Feltes Chuck, You were right about Y2K. I'll be there for initiation rites next week. Love, Shauna -- Shauna Doughty Dear old friend, Everybody's got egg on their face. I'll bring the bread crumbs. -- Brian Riemer Thanks for your submissions -- and check back in two weeks for the next Salon 21st Challenge. SALON | Jan. 15, 1999 Charlie Varon is a humorist and playwright. His works include "Ralph Nader Is Missing" and "Rush Limbaugh in Night School." Jim Rosenau is a writer, editor and software designer in Berkeley, Calif. Jim and Charlie are also co-founders of the citizen group Californians for Earthquake Prevention and partners in Mockingbird Productions, which offers a full line of comic services.